Fern's Kitchen

For most of my life growing up, my mom's kitchen annoyed and amazed me at the same time.
My parents did not believe in the home upgrade so the same basic kitchen that was in the house they purchased in 1968 remained until that house sold in 2001. Mom was always ok with this.

The annoying parts:
No dishwasher, unorganized pots and pans, not enough counter space, old, old Formica tops, no great knives and the messiest silverware drawer ever. If you washed dishes and someone was in the shower, they ended up with third degree burns.

The amazing parts:
Always a great meal.

When mom sold her house and moved into a shared house with Vince and Sharon, they built her a small kitchen in her part of the house. For some crazy reason it's a smaller replica of the same bad kitchen she always had!
No counter space, no garbage disposal, no dishwasher, no good knives, limited power outlets, and a low sink that kills the back when you are washing dishes. I call this the camper. And if you leave the kitchen door open while you cook anything at all, the smoke alarm goes off in the entire house. Really loud. And annoying.
Again, my mom does not mind this. It drives me crazy.

Since I have been here we have had a few big family meals.
Between Dec.23 and Christmas Day she made 50 meatballs, tomato sauce with pork neck bones, baked 15 pork chops, roasted a pork loin, made pasta, ravioli and Italian wedding soup (with 50 smaller meatballs!). I made stuffing and salad, chopping with only one chopping surface. All in a space smaller than a master bathroom.

I personally did dishes at least 10 times. We had family meals, just the 12 of us, at least 4 times. My mom was exhausted, but happy to have us all there, even though we bicker and complain about the camper.

Lots of love goes into all that cooking. Which is shared through the food. And in the end, who cares if the kitchen is top notch?

Tribe time

I arrived in Cincinnati last night to begin my 10-day holiday stay.
My flight was full of families, but it went quickly. Gina was, I think, happy to see me. She got to pick me up without anyone with her...a small miracle! We had a chance to talk on the way home, mostly about how Christmas is just not as fun as it once was...too many self-involved teenagers. I remember when Vincent was born (23 years go) and that first Christmas I came home. The family chemistry had changed. Everything revolved around "the baby".
I remember thinking, what happened here??? Adult conversation was limited. As soon as the baby made any sound, everyone's attention was diverted.

Many things have changed in the last 20 years but, I think in the last few years we have had yet another big shift. My nieces, 21, 20, 19 are all very much into can you top this. To the point of inappropriate. I am at a loss as to what to talk to them about. I have tried movies, music, tv, fashion. It's all a one-way street. I say, "Did you see the latest whatever show”. Response: I this, I that, my friend this, I do, I am. Never much of an exchange. You must be up for the blather of "I know you are, but what am I" mentality. It’s just sort of uninspired, yet annoying.

Mom Tina and Gina all spend too much time talking about them. This bothers me. I want to just ignore them and spend time with the grown ups. But no. We have the tribe mentality. Even though I think they are adults, they act like babies. They expect that we should plan meals, activities, rides. Again annoying.

So I am trying to find my place in this tangled web and maintain some sense of boundary.

I am trying my best to be in neutral with everyone. Stay tuned.

Bob Braun

Today I cleaned out my t-shirt drawer and at the bottom was an authentic vintage t-shirt that says The Bob Braun Show.
This is classic Cincinnati kitsch! Of course, it’s on the small side and it has a few stains, but all in all, its in good shape.
Who should have this treasure, who could squeeze into it? A few things came to mind. First off, it used to be owned by my brother Tony. No one could squeeze into a t-shirt like Tony. I wish I could find a photo of this! It brings to mind more than one instance of his fashion felonies! The thing I realize now at age 52 was that he was so young when he died and when you are young, you can pull off allot of bad fashion and still maintain some sense of cool. Not so much when you are older!

I thought of giving the shirt to one of his daughters, but they don't remember Bob. And both of them inherited our ample bosoms! Bob would be very distorted...not good!

Then my friend Monica came to mind. She qualifies because she is a friend of both Tony and myself!
And she was buying and wearing vintage clothes in 1972. She could put together fabulous, funky outfits from thrift stores across Ohio and Kentucky. This is part of her legacy, this cool vintage look. And of course, she is tiny, so the shirt will fit. I can't wait to see how she works it in!

So Monica, if you are reading this, I just packed the t-shirt in my suitcase and now we have a reason to get together next week! Details to come....

Gratitude

I read a blog today about someone who lost 85% of thier hearing and how they were dealing with a new surgery to hopefully correct it. It reminded me that the reason I started to write was to document my gratitude. It seems I have slipped a little so here is my short list of things for which I am thankful::

* My health, that I remain cancer free, on my way to fitness and 30 pounds lighter
* For my crazy family and that right now, today, all is well, everyone is relatively happy and healthy
* For my friends
* For my ability to create something from nothing, every single day, without fail
* For my neverending ability to earn a living
* For my clients, vendors and business associates who have supported me this year
* For my dog, although I'm not sure who is the boss of who!
* For all my new stuff!
this computer, my fabulous bathroom, the deck and even the cheap, but cute tshirts from Old Navy!
* For my old stuff: my beautiful home, my sturdy Honda and somewhat functional kitchen

And, most importantly, for my ability to get up everyday and see the glass half full.

Thank you, universe for a fabulous life.